Now that you have looked at the hard wiring of your thinking (values and beliefs), it is time to look at your character and capacity. Your capacity are skills you need to reach your goal or your “promised land.” Every job vocation has 5-7 key skills that are required for you to do the job well. Do you know what they are? Which ones are you working to develop? This can apply to being a good parent, leader, or volunteer worker. This situation is great opportunity to identify your missing pieces to the puzzle. It can likely be the reason you keep repeating the same things over and over again and are feeling frustrated. So ask yourself these questions about your capacity.
What people skills do you need?
What technical skills do you need?
What life skills do you need?
What are my missing pieces in this situation?
Every time you make a decision, big or small, you are etching your soul or your character. I believe that successful people have significant ballast in their ship. Ballast keeps the ship steady through storms. That ballast is character. Success and achievement without character could leave your morally bankrupt. We can list numerous people who have been very successful, but in the end they failed and did not end their lives well because of their poor choices.
Your choices are linked to your beliefs and values that materialize in your character. It begins with being honest with yourself in the smallest things, especially when no one else is watching. Every thing grows and builds upon that activity. Just remember that your life will become the sum of all choices you make in life and it will determine what you become and will create your character.
Some questions to ask yourself:
- Are you making good choices?
- Are they ethical?
- Will they help people or hurt them?
- Will they create sustainability?
- Do they pass the newspaper test?
- What moral flaws do you see in your thinking?
- What are the parts of your character that need strengthening?
Now that you have identified your capacity and character areas, we need to face the big “C” word: Commitment.
Commitment is action.
In order to achieve your goal or vision requires commitment and perseverance. That means not giving up is not an option. If you have successfully evaluated your values, beliefs, capacity, and character and are on target, you now have a road map. Everything of value is worth working for. This can get messy you do not have a congruent approach regarding your values, beliefs, capacity, and character. Many people fail because they did not go through the first steps, or they did not accurately identify their missing pieces. Others don’t make it to their “promised land” because they give up. If you have done good self assessments, your goals should be linked to something that you value and are passionate about. The momentum that comes from engaged beliefs and values that are fueled by your passion is unstoppable. If per chance you get tired and lose hope during journey, make sure you have a support team. Many fail the execution part because they do this thing called life or create a new business without a support team to encourage you when things get hard.
As I stated earlier, success is not just achieving a goal. It is what you become as you add valuable contribution. Living a life of fulfillment is an art that few discover. Many achieve great things, but are still not satisfied with their accomplishments. Based on my experience and working with many clients, it is because they have not focused on the “becoming” part. When there is a incongruity in your beliefs and value system, and there are character deficiencies, typically some form of chaos follows that robs us of our sense of significance in life.
If you are serious about your life, your work, family, business, take a look at this process. If you don’t have the ability to answer these questions and get the results you need, seek out a mentor or a coach to help you!